ego
is it me? or it's just simply human.

friends out there, do give me advice. i really need one or perhaps more hehe.

well, 3 months ago i played vball representing my department. it was nice, well, not only does we win but also satisfying as i could play in all of the games. it kinda reminded me with my team in secondary school. gee, at dat time, i wasn't even the top 6 player pun. simpanan macam sekarang. hehe.

back in the old school days, being a sparing member in any sports is kinda satisfying for me. gee, i know that i didn't measure up to the rest of the team as can't really spike eventhough i can consistently serve and digging well. at dat time, 5-6pm is a time to play. yep even in exam week, at 5-6pm, i'll be in the court. i did that all throughout my 5 years in school. hasilnya, well i manage to represnt my school 3 times. and yep as a reserve player. cumanya in the last year, i had a conversation with mak, stating my disapointment ofnot being able to be in the first 6. and her reaction is cool, urging me to play because of the love, passionate for the game. and she did get me to love sports. and since then, not only vball, i love swimming and netball aswell.

and 3 months ago, i got to play vball after for nearly 3 year hiatus of any sports. hehe why such a hiatus, kata love for sports hehe. well, it took me 3 years to adjust hehe to the life i'm leading now. alhamdullilah.
i and impress and proud with k dilla. hehe i rembered reading her blog on playing nball while her 2nd child was only a couple of months. syok bila baca sorang hafiz jaga sorang ikut dia. i like to see children in fields.
hehe when i brought sya to the field, it's like an ocean for her. wide, mammoth space to run, jump, juggle the ball. yas, in the kangaroo bag. hehe.

after the inter department match, i kinda fell the rush and love for sports again. hehe, bukan itu sahaja, its like everyone noticed me. hehe well, maybe perasan gakla kot haha. takpe la sesekali nak perasan. hehe, from the library front desk lady to the dean (dean nih for sure. masakan tak kenal anak buah sendiri hahahah) noticed me in the court.

anyway, i has been called to be a 'sparing' member for the team in a bogger league. well, again, the love for the sport. i agreed.

but, after a while. gee, after a while, being sitted on the bench, the love kinda fading. hehe talked to abahQas, and his reponds were simple, "when you're the player, absorbed the cheer from the backbenchers and when you're the backbenchers, cheer la for the player!" ah, aku tak buleh. hehe and it always ended up me walking away from the court, heading back to home. bukan merajuk hehe sebab esok nya turun balik main bersama2. and after 2 months of training, yesterday, the scene was sstill da same.... sharp at 6.30, (2 half game), i turn on the engine, drove back home, play with yas.

sounds sellfish huh.